Easter

Why seek ye the living among the dead? He is not here, but is risen.

The Gate

   One of the things that we have to do as missionaries is give up most contact with our family and friends at home. We get to call our families on Christmas and Mother's Day and email them once a week. It's a difficult thing to do, and for some, more difficult. For me, it's been a tremendously hard thing. In the months before coming on my mission, I was closer to each member of my family than I ever have been. To leave that behind -
   It's been hard to say the least.
   And as such, I'm looking forward to the day I go home and get to see all of them. I'm looking forward with anticipation the warm, loving embraces I'll give to and receive from each one of them.
   The one I'm looking forward to the most, however, is the one I'll share with my dad. Don't get me wrong; I love every other member of my family and the friends that will be there. They each mean so much to me. However, my dad is still my hero, even at 21-years old. I wish that I could talk to him daily about my life to gain his insight. I miss laughing with him, spending time with him, eating his amazing home-made ice cream, and more. That will all come again one day, but it will have to wait awhile longer.
   This morning, I was thinking about that during my studies (I was admiring my newly-acquired picture of the prodigal son and his father). As I was thinking about that, I stumbled upon a reference to this scripture and the light bulb turned on!

41 O then, my beloved brethren, come unto the Lord, the Holy One. Remember that his paths are righteous. Behold the way for man is narrow, but it lieth in a straight course before him, and the keeper of the gate is the Holy One of Israel; and he employeth no servant there; and there is none other way save it be by the gate; for he cannot deceived, for the Lord God is his name.

   That has absolutely nothing to do with embraces, fathers, family, or anything which I just talked about. So, let's do an exploded view of it. Let's take it apart, shall we?

I made this myself in Windows Paint. I know, it's awesome! Click to make it bigger.
(And I just checked the preview. On my screen it still goes way too far out!)

   I hope you can read that. I didn't want to make it too big to dominate the page.
   So, the question is posed, "Why does Jesus Christ employ no servant at the Gate?" I thought about it for awhile and could come up with only one satisfactory answer:
   To wait for us. Jesus Christ wants to stand there at that gate to personally welcome us home. Not to guard it nor polish the pearly material. Not to stand with a clipboard to make sure we're on the list before entering. He could have someone else stand there to do that while He attends to a million other things.
   No, none of those things suffice. In my mind, there is no other reason for Him to be there than to await our arrival. Like the father who saw his son when he was 'yet a great way off' and ran to embrace him, like my father will be waiting for me at the airport in a few months, Jesus Christ waits for us at the Gate.
   And it is my personal conviction that He waits to run to us, embrace us, tell us that He loves us, walk with us back the the gate, and welcome us home.

   Now do you see the connection between the scripture and my thoughts?
   Well good!


   He's waiting!
 

On a cold Monday night...

   Monday night, I talked to a man on his doorstep for awhile. The conversation made me happy and made me sad. Let me explain.

(Insert interrogation scene with one dark room, one swinging, low light in the center, one man with a heavy fist and loud voice, and one man with a shivering, quivering voice.)

   "Where were you on the night of Monday, December 19th, 2011?!"
   "Oh! I... I was... I was in my car! Driving! With my companion, Elder Blowers!"
   "What were you doing?!"
   "Well, our... our appointment had fallen through and we were just heading back to our car..."

(Insert time rewinding noises)

   "You know, Elder Blowers, I'm not going to lie - there was a part of me that expected that appointment to fall through. I wanted him to be there, but..." I shivered in the cold night as I approached the car.

   "Yeah, I know what you mean. I wanted to teach him too. He would have been great."

   I opened the car door and got in the driver's seat. Elder Blowers soon got in on the other side. I put the key in the ignition and twisted it. The car shivered to life in the cold, Fort Bragg night, and we pulled away from Jonathan's house.

   "Let's see." Blowers said as he opened his planner and pressed the light on in the cabin. "We had planned to go see the Mortons. They live over on Oak Street." In response, I turned around and headed to their home. However, a name of a man who I had never met continued to come to my mind. I couldn't suppress it, so I acted on it. 

   "Hey, Elder. Where does Robert live?

   "Rob? Rob Miller?" - I nodded - "He lives back that way, on Springs Road."

   "Alright. I haven't been able to get him out of my mind. We need to go see him." And thus, we sped off. We must have looked comical making two U-turns on the same street, but we needed to see this man - I didn't know why.

   A few minutes later (and only one wrong turn!), we pulled up in front of Rob's home. As we knocked on the door, my companion voiced his thoughts: he was wondering if Rob would be home - he never had been before. Quickly, though, his thoughts were answered with foot steps and a jiggle at the door handle. The door swung wide, light flooded the doorstep, and...

   "Gentlemen!" Rob stepped out and shook our hands. He and my companion shook hands and exchanged greetings, and then he turned to me. 

   "Hey! It's good to meet you Rob! I'm Elder Nuckles!" And then came that quizzical look that, really, I'm quite accustomed to.

   "Nuckles? Really?" I laughed and said that it was real. We spoke for a moment laughing about some things, and then I explained why we were there. I told him that I felt like we really needed to come see him. His mouth smiled at that, but his eyes betrayed him, even in the dark. I asked him how he was doing and his mouth then matched his eyes.

   He began to tell us the situation he was in at that point in his life. This is the part where I got sad. His was one of the stories that hurt inside. Listening to the hard times that he's fallen on really broke my heart. (I don't think that I could ever be a therapist. I think about other people's problems far too much!)

   He went on for awhile and I was at a loss for words. Some of those things just hurt. Some of them just sent shivers down my spine.

   (Pause the story. Before someone sends angry fan mail (fans! Ha. That's a good one) saying that everyone exaggerates and you need to hear both sides of the story, I want you to know that I know that. However, there is a grain of truth behind everything, and these stories hurt. Now, resume story)

   Minutes passed as he told us his stories. Eventually, a break came, and I took the moment to ask him how he was doing spiritually and if he felt he was close to God. He exhaled, looked me in the eye, and stated, "I'm close to God. I know that Jesus Christ is my personal Savior and that he loves me. I know that the two appeared to Joseph Smith and restored their truths."

    Now that made me happy.

    We continued to talk and he shared a few more stories. and then I shared with him a story from Elder Jeffrey R. Holland.

   He smiled and thanked me. We prayed with him and then left.

   As we I watched him close his door, I shivered in the dark night. 

(Fast forward to the present, back to the dark interrogation room.)

   "What did you tell him?! Go on! What was the story?!"

   "It was the hopeful story entitled Good Things to Come."

                     Enjoy :)

Fellowship of the Unashamed

Thank you, President Eyring, for this amazing quote about being a disciple of Jesus Christ:

I am part of the Fellowship of the Unashamed. The die has been cast. I have stepped over the line. The decision has been made; I am a Disciple of Jesus Christ. I won't look back, let up, slow down, or be still. My past is redeemed, my present makes sense, and my future is secure. I'm finished and done with low living, small planning, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tainted visions, worldly talking, cheap giving, and dwarfed goals. I no longer need preeminence, positions, promotions, plaudits, or popularity, I don't have to be right, first recognized, praised, regarded, or rewarded. I now live by faith, lean on His presence, walk with patience, am uplifted by prayer, and labor with power. My face is set, my gait is fast, and my goal is heaven. My road is narrow, my way is rough, my companions are few, my Guide is reliable, my mission is clear. I cannot be bought, compromised, detoured, lured away, divided, or delayed. I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the presence of the adversary, negotiate at the table of the enemy, ponder in the pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of mediocrity. I won't give up, shut up, or let up until I have stayed up, stored up, and paid up for the cause of Christ. I must go till He comes, give till I drop, preach till all know, and work till He stops me. And when He returns for His own, He will have no problem recognizing me. My banner will be clear.

That is all. :)

Firetruck!

   Today, Elder Russell and I were waiting at a light, waiting to turn right. Waaaaaaaaay off in the distance, we could see some flashing lights. They were coming rapidly closer. And I mean, rapidly closer. Soon, we could see this fire engine hauling tail down the road. It was weaving through 5 lanes (two either direction and the turning lane) like it was some small, light, fast European sports car. The driver was borderline reckless! And that's exactly what I thought as he flew passed us as we quietly sat in the turning lane with our bikes in the back and the turning signal on.

   It reminded me of the following. It's a quote from  Elder Jeffrey R. Holland's talk For Times of Trouble:

[If] our eyes could be opened we would see horses and chariots of fire as far as the eye can see riding at reckless speed to come to our protection. They will always be there, these armies of heaven, in defense of Abraham’s seed. 

   You have to admit, that's cool. So, that's why I thought of as this fire engine raced down the street to someone's rescue.

   You go, firemen. You go.

There are these cool buildings...

   Sometimes I wish that I could stick a recording device in my head so that I could show people what and how I think. People would really get a kick out of it.

   

   The Gospel is a pretty cool thing. As in, really cool. I was looking at some of my fellow-missionaries blogs before I began to write this one. I looked towards the top of the page and saw the words 'Next Blog >>.' 

   

   Sure, why not? So, I clicked it.

   I stumbled upon a woman's blog about her life and her family. She has 4 kids and a husband. Her kids range from a young girl (7 maybe?), a pre-teen son, another son who just began driving, and a daughter who has a newborn baby. 

  

   While surveying her blog, I could just... feel her love for her family. I got lost and completely absorbed in it for awhile, I must admit. She was talking about how she loves her kids, her husband, her life, and all the time she spends with her family. She wrote about her imperfections, her weaknesses, but her love for life overall as well.

   It got me thinking.

   Isn't it cool how we can be with our families forever?

   I don't have a family of my own yet (just my siblings and parents back home), but one day, when I have my own wife and kids, I know that I'll want to be able to be with them forever. 

   Which makes me think about Temples. 

   Temples are sacred places where ordinances are performed so that we can be with our families forever. An actual, real physical ordinance performed by the power of God and Jesus Christ- not just a feeling that we can have!

   Which makes me think about how I like architecture. And, not to boast, but LDS temples have few things that compare to them in beauty. 

   Let me take you on a trip.

  

You've been working here all day long. Probably feeling something akin to these...

...blockheads.

The day ends. Time to drive home... except it's rush hour. 

Poppycock.

Great. Even better. "It'll be even longer until I get home to see my spouse." you think to yourself.

Wow. Construction, too. This is awesome. "I'm never going to get home tonight. No time with my kids."

Then suddenly, because of the frozen-molasses paced marathon that you're stuck in, you notice something that you haven't seen in your normal, hurried drive home.

"Vwhaat eeez deees?"
(Said like the Chef from the Little Mermaid when he finds Sebastian)

Traffic is ridiculously terrible, so you decide you'll explore this peculiarity while you wait for the roads to clear up and save some gas. Good idea. You're not going anywhere fast anyway.


 So off you go.

You wind your way through all the trees towards whatever that building could be...

and suddenly...

BAM!

Temple. 

There's something... there's something about this building that begs the question, "What are you doing in a world like this?" 

Here you stand, awestruck as you examine this otherworldly building. There's something... something about it that is completely... 

 ...otherworldly.

Not alien. Not demonic. But... heavenly. So you wonder, "What purpose do you possibly have, building?"

Well, let me tell you.

Enjoy!

The Atonement and being Scatter-brained

   It's pretty easy for my mind to get scatter-brained and distracted. I'm having one of those moments right now and because of that, I can't remember what I was going to write my blog about. And that's how life is for me.

   Recently, my mind has been on the Atonement of Jesus Christ a lot. And rightfully so - it's only the most important event in the history of everything. I've always wondered exactly how the Atonement works - and that's something that I'll keep wondering. We won't understand that in this lifetime.

   I also like to think about what the Atonement does for us. I feel like this is a subject that missionaries speak on all the time. Yet, I want to add my own touch to it and that is what I'll be attempting to do here.

   Let's get the basics: The Atonement of Christ refers to the suffering of Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane, His subsequent death on the cross, and His glorious resurrection thereafter. It is through the Atonement of Christ that we are cleansed from our sins and transgressions and we will be given a perfect body that will never die again.

   Somehow, it's also through the Atonement that we are changed. Again, I don't understand how it works - I just know that Christ does change us. He makes us happier, He gives us hope, He is the author of our faith. I wish I knew more about the Atonement so that I could share it with you all. 
   All I know is that the Atonement is real. I can't see it, I can't touch it, I can force someone else to believe in it. However, I can feel it. It's the best thing ever.
   
   I apologize for having such a short, scatter-brained post. Maybe next week I'll have something better.